Thursday, April 2, 2009

It's overwhelming.....

I spent the last hour rabbit trailing from blog to blog as I clicked on sidebar buttons that were asking for prayer. I also visited a few caring bridge sites. It's sort of emotionally paralyzing. Even having a friend going through the process of having a child who is fighting cancer, I basically go through my day like any other person. True, they come to mind several times a day, and when they do...I pray for them, but I'm not LIVING it the way the are. The way SO MANY people are in this world.

When I said before that it's sort of emotionally paralyzing...I mean that my mind, my heart kind of want to just shut down. It's easier NOT to care too much. It's easier to quickly click out of the site because it's so heavy and unimaginable.

But those families can't just click out of the situation they are in, and as UNIMAGINABLE as it is...they are living the reality every moment of everyday. For many the reality includes loneliness. So many people with sick children have to go to special hospitals, and often those hospitals are not near where they live. So families are separated as one parent stays with their sick child at the hospital and the other stays home with the other children, or to work. The bills don't stop when your child is fighting a horrible disease! In fact they most likely increase!!

I'm just struck this evening by how crazy life is and how disconnected we are to what's going on around us sometimes. I'm struck by how blessed I am to have two healthy children and how basically I totally and completely take that for granted.

My friend who's son (Luke) is fighting AML is an amazing person who so easily can talk to people and truly relate with them on a personal level. She has a gift. When Luke was in the hospital last time and I would go to visit I often saw her having conversations with the other parents and observed the heartfelt love she gave to them in those brief moments. Over the last year she attended NUMEROUS funerals. Funerals of children. many of us are so oblivious. Oblivious to the pain that is going on around us. It's everywhere...and it's overwhelming.

I'm processing as I'm writing this. I guess that's my point in posting about it.

I needed to process my thoughts.


  1. Like that Casting Crown's song....give my your eyes for just one second....Not sure if thats the title. But imagine seeing everything that God sees! Wow- the sick, the hurting, the lonely, well....I think the point is, we are suppose to, on a smaller level. It seems as though God may be using this time to reveal a part of Himself to you, and His plan for you. Just stay honest and vulnerable- love you-

  2. I feel the same way! She is such a blessing to those she meets! I feel guilty for worrying about silly things in our daily life. Luke is so strong and I think their sense of humor help them smile! I too think about them all the time and it is so comforting to know that God is in control. How else can one get through so much? Thanks Shannon!!

  3. It is so hard to read it all. I can spend hours in an evening just reading them all. And then my heart hurts so bad. I had a little baby in the ER yesterday who died of SIDS. I balled like a baby. Sometimes it's just so hard knowing I'm going home to kiss my healthy girls good night, and this family's life was just shattered.

    I just have to sing, "How great is our God!" over and over and try not to take a day for granted.


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