What's wrong with me?

Today I'm on a Tirade...and it's about MYSELF!!!

I'm totally living in this place of frustration with myself. My nature in the past has been to be a tunnel vision type of person. When I'm into something...I'M INTO IT.

A year and a half ago it was coupon shopping. I lived and breathed it. I was saving money and it was good. But then it was my daughter's birthday and we put the house up for sale and my mind didn't seem to be able to handle it all. Then it was onto house plans...oh boy did I live and breath house plans! Somewhere in there I was really good and focused about my cleaning schedule for the house and planning out my meals. But I guarantee you I wasn't doing good with that while doing one of those other things.

Then there's the things I do that are easy to laugh at (and I do) but they also made me cry when I did them...like back into the garage door at the last house...two different times....both times from INSIDE the garage trying to get out! Then like 6 months ago I backed into a pole that only 10 minutes before when I got out of the car I had noticed and said to myself..."don't back into that pole" When these things happen I have an honest reaction of crying because I truly wonder what it wrong with me.

In the last year and a half I have experienced the emotion of being overwhelmed by things...and that NEVER use to happen to me. So my tunnel vision and my forgetfulness (or whatever you want to call it) affects more than just me. It affects my family because I get so enveloped in what I'm doing sometimes that I neglect other things that need to get done...even the simple things like laundry. But when you have a husband whose love language is Acts of Service...this doesn't exactly fill up his love tank!

So I spent yesterday telling my counselor how screwed up I am. She suggested that I plan out a daily schedule and really try to stick to it. Plan when I'm going to do blog design. Plan when I'm going to do housework. Plan when I'm going to exercise. Plan when I'm going to have my quiet time with God. I know that to some of you all this planning sounds heavenly....but to me it sounds like my own personal hell! But I'm going to do it and that will be the last time that I say I'm going to hate it! Because I really want to have a positive attitude about it and not train my brain to think that I can't do it! The other thing I'm suppose to do is go to the library and get this book about cognitive thinking. Apparently its about being in the moment that you are in instead of the next one....which is why I back into the garage door apparently...because my mind is thinking about what is next instead of what is currently going on. Right now I think that's what it means anyway. I need to get the book. Hopefully I can learn how to think cognitively...because the new garage doors need to stay dent free!!!

So that's my tirade. I'm frustrated with myself and the way I function. And I want it to change. Now I just need to make the effort and take the steps to move forward and do it!

Do any of you ever feel like this though? What is it about YOU that bugs YOU?

What’s on my mind today….Well, it’s really not that much of a Tirade today…but here it goes…..

Actually I’m in a pretty good mood today! You would think with VBS I’d be stressed, but I’m not. I’m super excited about planning the Friday Carnival this year. Last year at this time I would’ve Tiraded about the Carnival….so that’s why I’m planning it this year. For the most part I’m a person who likes to live by the code of “If you’re gonna complain then you have to be willing to be a part of the solution!” I realize that sometimes that’s just not possible. But when it is…I try!

I suppose I could Tirade about that…people who only complain but NEVER DO anything about it….oh but then I’d be talking about myself and how I complain about my body but don’t work out and eat like food is going out of style!

Ok, where was I…oh yes, I was in a good mood!

Anyway…I’m excited and I will have to tell you more about the carnival over the weekend. I’ll take lots of pics! It’s gonna be fun!

Ok, so this may change ya’lls opinion about me altogether…but I think ya’ll should know that I watch The BACHELORETTE! Oh my goodness who would’ve thunk that she would’ve ended up with Jesse with the pink shoe laces, and neon splatter painted jacket? But they were the most giddy couple I’ve seen on that show!! And they already set a wedding date! Could there FINALLY be another marriage out of this show after like 8 years or something like that!!! I think the tell tale sign of who she was choosing was when she took Jesse on the romantic private island date and then she took Jason scuba diving with sharks!

Well, I’m feeling like it was kind of a boring Tirade today…OH OH OH! I know….SPAM! Blogger comment SPAM! Oooooh it makes me mad. A few months back I had to add the word verification to my comment form because I would always get one spam comment right away after I would post. I have more than one blog…so it was especially annoying. So, it’s been a few months and I decided to lift the word verification to see if maybe the spammers had given up on my blog since I’d blocked them for so long…..NOT SO MUCH! I posted and IMMEDIATELY got THREE spam comments within like 2 minutes of posting. So now I’m back to the word verification thing again! ANNOYING!

Ok, now I’m done!

Comments Please!

My "blogiversary" is coming up. July 16th will be one year since my first post. This is post #257. WOW!! 257 posts! That's crazy! But do you want to know what is even MORE CRAZY than that? (it's Tirade time people!!) What's MORE CRAZY is that out of 256 previous posts the most comments any ONE person has ever left me is a total of 37 (Kelli is the current highest ranked commenter....she just surpassed my sister) C'MON PEOPLE! SERIOUSLY!

Where is the comment love? I try to be a good blogger! I try to be consistent. I post often. Am I asking to much when I ask for some comment love? There are two categories of non-commenters out there...the ones I know and love...and the LURKERS as they are called in blogland. The secretly look at your blog but never let you know. I WANNA KNOW! And I wanna know what you think. If you agree with my Tuesday Tirades...let me know! If you don't...shout about it! On Monday Masterpiece....a little..."those are great" would do. Wordless Wednesday...does not apply to comments!!! Thinking Back Thursday....hey, it takes time to think back and come up with those...comment about what it makes you remember...tell me I'm a dork....I DON'T CARE! JUST SAY SOMETHING!! I'm not kiddin' here people!! I'm on a TIRADE and I'm not kiddin'!!

Now, DON'T YOU DARE NOT COMMENT!!
Thanks to those of you who comment and comment often! I will say that I almost always leave a comment when I visit a blog! So I tend to practice what I preach here!
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oh, and on a completely different note:
my MIL is doing a giveaway for an item of her fabulous jewelry! The giveaway starts July 1st! Go HERE for details!


***I changed the comment feature on my blog. I think it deleted all my past comments though. Not sure. I hope I didn't totally screw something up here! We shall see! I did it in hopes to be able to email responses directly back to the commenter if I so choose. (instead of the good old fashioned blogger way of clicking on the profile...then going to their blog and leaving a comment) Go forth and comment!

From light hearted to deep!

I remember LOVING summer vacation!
Don't you remember absolutely LOVING summer vacation! I DO! Apparently my kids don't share the same feelings. We were on day two of summer break and my kids were standing in the doorway trying to come inside as I'm TELLING them to GO OUTSIDE AND PLAY!! They are constantly trying to come up with a plan and "can I call...." stuff like that. Here is the response they got from me...."It's day two of summer! You better figure out something to do and go do it because there are like 60 more days of summer left!" Their response..."WHAT? 60 more days. Seriously?" Who are these children and why do they look like me?

My house:
I have to go pick out all my light fixtures this week. I'M SO DONE WITH ALL OF THIS! Seriously. I don't want to pick anything else out! I just want someone else to do it and I want to walk in the house and have it all be done and say, "wow, it looks fabulous!"

Thoughts on Faith:
I think that too many of us are looking for answers outside of God's word. I think that too many of us are reading books filled with doctrinal theories written by a man and accepting what those men have to say as truth. Even some fictional books with heavy faith issues seem to be the source of some peoples inspiration as of late. I'm not saying that we can't learn and be inspired by these things. I know that can happen, and I know that not all the doctrinal theory books out there are "bad." I just think that there are definitely some things out there right now that are off, but what is off about it is being mixed in between some truth and because of that we as a christian culture are letting it slide and letting it seep into our lives. I heard the statement recently..."don't throw the baby out with the bath water." I love the person who said this to me dearly and we had a REALLY good discussion about it. But in the end I still disagreed with the premise of the statement. The problem is, we may be "throwing out the bathwater" but sometimes the bathwater has already contaminated the baby before it gets thrown out. We need to be more careful with what we are putting in the tub...that's all I'm saying!

WOW! Ok, I got a little deep today! Lucky for ya'll tomorrow is Wordless Wednesday!

AAAAHHHHHHHH!

Hey my fellow SITStas! Every Tuesday I do this Tirade Tuesday thing and tell ya'll what is on my mind. On Mondays I feature my blog designs with Masterpiece Monday, Tuesday is Tirade Tuesday....Wednesday is Wordless Wednesday and Thursday is Thinking Back Thursday where I share stories from my past (like this). Enjoy! I'm excited about all the SITSta comment love that is on its way!! If you get a chance don't forget to visit my blog design portfolio at www.eightcrazydesignportfolio.blogspot.com

Oh, and don't forget to enter the giveaway today at Tip Junkie that is featuring an EightCrazy Designs giveaway for a $28 gift card towards a blog design!!


First things first....don't you ever just need to SCREAM!!! I won't get into why, because I can't think of a way to say it and not upset some people, but this is me SCREAMING!!!! AAAAAHHHHHHH! All I will say is, sometimes it's hard to watch people make the choices they make.

ok, moving on....
Young boys/men of today:
I've been taking my son to the skate park lately so he can have fun learning and doing "cool tricks" on his scooter and skate board. Have you been to one of these? It's full of young boys and they don't look AT ALL like young boys did...well..when I was youngER! The long hair, the jeans that don't fit to the point that they have to walk funny just to keep them up. The UNDERWEAR that should just be called OUTERWEAR! (seriously...why do I need to see their underwear?!) Them showing their underwear is no more appropriate than a girl's g-string showing...in my opinion!! PLEASE PULL YOUR PANTS UP BOYS!

Conspiracy Theory:
Do any of you ever get sent by your hubby to run an errand for him? An errand where he gives you specific details and instructions on what to get. Then you get there and tell the guy at the store and he just stares at you like you are a complete IDIOT? This seems to happen to me almost every time my guy sends me out. Now, I know he really loves me enough NOT to do this, but in that moment when I'm being looked at by the guy at Home Depot like I've lost my mind.....I think to myself, "Does he do this on purpose? Is it like a joke that husbands like to play on their wives and then laugh about it with their buddies?" Like I said, I know he doesn't, but seriously, do any of ya'll ever feel that way?

Gas Prices:
Today is the last day of school. Looks like I'll be staying home even more than I already have been! This is crazy people! I used to go to Target, Kohls, Ross, etc at least once a week. I had to go to Target this weekend to get Father's day gifts, and I couldn't even remember the last time I had been there! I'm totally stickin' close to home these days! I've always taken my daughter to school and picked her up from school most days as well. This last month we've totally switched to school bus both ways. Times are tight people! Are you feelin' it? What's changed in your life due to gas prices? The ridiculous part about it all is how we could be completely independent from foreign oil if we wanted to be....but instead we will just be GREEN and BROKE! Oh and I'm sure the pharmaceutical companies will end up benefiting from this as well because more people will end up on anti-depressants because of the stress of finances and loneliness from never going anywhere!

take it or leave it.......that's what's on my mind today!

What's on my mind today in regards to:

blogland: I'm totally excited about the "best looking" nomination. Did you vote yet? (read two posts ago)
oh, have you been reading the real life story that mindless junque is telling? OHHH my goodness! It's the story of how she met her husband, but she started the story from when she was a teenager. She's broken it up into parts. She is on part Ten right now. She leaves you hanging each time and I find myself checking...checking...checking for the next installment!
If you want to read it click here!

the house: I'm actually kind of freaking out a little bit. There's always that stage where you freak and wonder if it's all going to come together in the end and be cohesive. Once flooring starts going down I'll probably start freaking even a little bit more. I'm not like TOTALLY freaking out right now....it's just this quiet concern inside every time I go over to the house. This too shall pass.

designing: I'm learning that I'm going to have to set boundaries and look at this as more of an actual job where I have "work hours" Otherwise I'm going to sit in this chair way too much and my behind will just get bigger and bigger.

Television: I'm still a little mad at the writers for striking! I WANT MY PRISON BREAK and I don't want to have to wait until the fall to get it! But I do!
LOST: what a perfect name for that show, because even though I watch each week...I'm still LOST! Seriously, they MOVED the island! What the heck? This is one trippy show. I hope the final ending someday isn't as disappointing as the final ALIAS was.


Politics: So Hillary stepped down and endorsed Obama. I really thought she would take it to the convention. For all you people out there who want them both on the ticket...I don't think that's gonna happen. Maybe if she would've won the nomination. But this way won't work. The Clinton's have way too much influence. Frankly it doesn't matter to me. I don't want either of them to be president. Not that I really WANT McCain either, but there just aren't ANY good choices this go around...as far as I'm concerned anyway.

Celebrityville: Susan Sarandon came out and said that if McCain won she was moving out of the USA. Ummmm......I believe you said that last time about Bush sweetie, and you are still here!


There you have it...take it or leave it...those are my thoughts today! Well, not my ONLY thoughts, but some of them anyway!